Porn Addiction Recovery
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Our pastor recently challenged us to read Romans 8 every day one week, and I love the way The Message puts it. It says the Law is like a Band-Aid (a cover up), where people tried and strived to match up, compare, win, earn their way.
This was my problem before Christ. I was always the good girl who earned approval and pleasure by pleasing others and trying to keep the peace. But that only led me into a deep depression where I dabbled in self-mutilation and overeating, drinking alcohol to help me sleep.
Then I married a guy who was, sadly, addicted to pornography, and I tried, in the name of intimacy, several dark twisted things to please him. I feel sorry for him and I don’t mean to blame him.
I blame porn!
Porn ruined us. It ruined our marriage and it tried to corrupt me. I thought reading all the right books and doing sweet things would win him, would keep us together, and win over pastors, counselors, friends and family who tried to help. I wanted to repent and fix our marriage but he ended it and we parted ways, which ended up being for the better.
I wish I could say I was a holy divorcee, but I only became more bitter and numb, allowing men to do what they wanted with me, trying all the wrong things like a bandage from Romans 8. I tried to lick my wounds and hide.
Then I was attacked and assaulted at work, not realizing one man’s sexual harassment would turn into advances and unwanted attention before becoming attempted rape.
After throwing myself into serving at church, I realized I was again attempting to cover up my past through work, even though I was still in bondage to sexual sin (but this time in my mind, since I wasn’t active sexually).
I then heard a sermon in June 2009, where I cried big drops of freedom tears. God broke through and I was free! No more bondage to porn, strip clubs, threesomes, alcohol, and other nasty dark things I had tried. Right then and there I rededicated my life to Christ! I thought I’d be happily single for years but I met my now husband that same month!
God removed everything out of my life so He could become my number one. He now has gone way above and beyond in how He has blessed me in so many fruitful ways! I have no reason to feel guilt, depressed, or any condemnation anymore!
So that’s my story. I know not everyone’s story will look like this, but I’m so grateful for the way my story is turning out! God wants to peel off your Band-Aids, enter your story, and turn it into something wonderful and uniquely His! (Tweet This!)
Do you have a story? We want to hear it.
The Wrong Way To Use a Band-Aid by XXXchurch.com is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License.