As parents, it can be easy to fall into the trap of advising our children to “do as I say, not as I do”.  I find that the parents of many of the teens I work with are telling their kids to stay “pure” sexually without modeling a pure sexual ethic to their children.  We live in a world where divorces, swinging and affairs are becoming the norm, and our kids feel as if their parents are in some...

It’s likely that when you first realize that your son or daughter wants to date, that you’ll be a little freaked out.  You might think they are too young, or you may worry about all that comes with dating: the emotional pitfalls, the physical struggles and lust, the potential heartbreak, etc.  Well, part of being a parent is being vulnerable to a life of worry for our children, so these...

 Shared with permission from a teeanger I worked with:

Growing up, I didn’t realize how good I had it.  I was the middle child, growing up in the suburbs.  My parents, my siblings and I went to church and attended a public school that set me up well enough to make it into a good college.  It wasn’t until I was in college and was taking part in a small group with my local chapter of...

Around this time of year, I find that many parents are completely unaware of what’s going on in their kids’ lives.  Many kids will be trying to push the limits sexually with their boyfriend or girlfriend; they’ll be sneaking off, planning a special “rendezvous” and telling some bold-faced lies to their parents.  On one hand, kids and teens can be pretty sneaky, and sometimes, they are able to...

Kids, especially girls, experience quite a lot of pressure around this time of year.  Our culture romanticizes Valentine’s Day as a time when romance blossoms, secret crushes are revealed, and every girl can find that special someone. 

I remember feeling the strain of Valentine’s Day when I was walking the halls of my high school, both when I was facing Valentine’s Day without a boyfriend and...

This is one of those moments we all dread: discovering that our little girl (or boy) may be pushing the limits sexually with their boyfriend or girlfriend.  One of the moms I work with found herself in this situation just a few days ago: she was vacuuming her daughter’s room, and when she lifted the bed skirt, she found a Forever 21 bag.  Her knees went weak as she pulled out lacy thongs and a...

Over the past few weeks, we’ve taken a hard look at the issue of getting “sober” from a pornography addiction, and one thing that I think any of us who have struggled with a pornography addiction can agree on is that getting “sober” can be tough work.  When we’re dealing with our children, helping them in their walk towards sobriety can seem even more challenging than overcoming our own.  We...

Every month I work with parents whose son or daughter has been exposed to pornography.  These parents feel angry, upset and overwhelmed about how to help their children move forward and how to “ensure” that their children haven’t been irreparably damaged as a result of the exposure.  

In all of these situations, I advise the parent to breathe and take a step back.  I tell them to make sure...

When we’re caught up in a pornography addiction, we often don’t realize the far-reaching implications of our actions.  We may begin to understand the impact on our wife or husband, but it’s often not until our own children have been exposed to pornography that we start to realize that our actions can impact the next generation.  And once your own children are exposed to pornography, it can...

When our kids are struggling with a pornography addiction, it’s important for us to walk with them in their recovery and in their walk towards sobriety.  Many of the kids that I work with desperately want to overcome their pornography addiction.  They have lost countless nights of sleep, seen their grades drop, have lost friends and have had their porn addictions impact their relationships...