I was running late. Driving from street to street lost in my frantic attempt to find the location of my porn house call. Waiting for me was a 16 year old boy, his mom, Dad, and older sister listening in from upstairs. I finally arrived for our porn conversation and was greeted with warm cookies, brownies, coffee, and I suppose anything else his mom could find. His Mom and Dad were very excited to have me in the house; the boy, our porn target, not so much. We sat down at the kitchen table and started talking porn, temptation, relationship with Jesus, and different safety nets available to help our 16 years old boy stay pure. By the end of the night we set up every computer in the house with the appropriate software, finished a tech lesson in internet temporary file erasing, took our porn workshop for a test run, and called it a night.
When I left, there were a few thoughts going through my mind.
1. Why was I qualified to make porn house calls?
I think it is important as Pastor's to remember that we are only one bad decision away from needing a porn house call ourselves. We are no better off or even that much further down the road than most people we counsel. This humble attitude is key to maintaing personal purity. The moment you believe you are not capable of moral failure is the day Satan sends out an all out assault in the form of lies. They sound like this: go out of your way to talk to "some attractive woman" she thinks you are amazing. It won't be any big deal to meet her for lunch today, don't tell your wife. Girls gone wi*d is not porn. A little porn is not that big of a deal. At least you're not having an affair with a real woman. Believe these lies and you will be calling for a porn house call.
2. Relationship with Jesus must never be second
A pastor must constantly seek Jesus. The combination of stress and self-dependence produces fertile ground for moral failure. I personally practice the habit of praying through the great Shema daily along with Romans 12. "God, today may I put nothing else before you. Give me the ability to love you with everything I am. I surrender my day to you for kingdom work."
3. Open communication is key to victory
Whether it is my child or my church I must continue to promote open communication around the issues of purity. If I am open with my congregation about the daily struggle to live rightly with my body before God then I keep the door open for others to share. In the scriptures we are called to live in the light (1 John 1:7) This is not a command to spread light through good deeds and acts of love, but to live in transparency with others, sharing your sins. I must have people in my life I am sharing my struggles with regularly. As a Pastor we must choose those people wisely, however, it is not wise to go at it alone. Who is that person in your life today? Are you being truthful and transparent with that person right now?
Thank you to all of you who continue to love those in the midst of struggle. A great way to continue loving those who struggle is through your personal commitment and journey in purity. Keep fighting.