Men - Questions

Me

How will i be able to refrain from watching porn. I try so hard to stop. I have even also prayed to god and asked for strength, but i always resort to porn. Please give me a personal reply. I dont need porn in where im headed in life. Please help!!! Thanks and God bless!!!

We understand that this is a tough battle that you are going through right now and you need to get it under control with being such a young age. Admitting to the fact that you have and addiction to this is one of the first steps.

Confess this to God and tell Him that you want to change and that you want for Him to send people in your life who will help you win this fight. He will hear your pray and He is a powerful God but, He will not just come down here and stop it for you. He will provide you the tools and the resources but, He wants you to step and do this thing.

After you have talked to God about this find someone right away that you know who can be your accountability partner. Someone who you see often and will have the ability to hold you accountable at all costs. Being your age I would suggest it be someone who is your elder and will be able to provide good mature counsel on this issue. This can be someone from your church, family member, and maybe even your parents. I know this step is tough but, you have to do this if you want to get free from this. You will not be able to do this on your own.

After you have an accountability partner you need to sit down with them and build a plan figure out what your triggers are and how they affect you. Get accountability software. If the internet or mobile devices are you hang up and this is where you turn to get your porn, get accountability and filter software right away and get this covered. We have a great program called X3 Watch that you could use for this. Set up a meeting schedule to meet with your accountability partner to discuss how things are going and if you are following your sobriety plan that you have developed with them.

Do not think this will go away over night; you have trained your brain to need this crap and you will need to train your brain that it is not needed and that it will hurt you. Celebrate small victories and do not give up if there are stumbles, keep going and dig in for the fight. Please know that you are not alone in this and thaGod loves you so much. He will never remove His love for you because of what you did, are doing, or might do during your recovery. We are here praying for you and know that you can do this.

Online gaming

My son is asking if he can play the on-line game, World of Warcraft. He is almost 16 and we have SafeEyes installed on the computer he can access. What are your thoughts on this gaming website and can it lead to sex sites or unprovoked interactions with other players? Does SafeEyes provide protection in this area?

Thanks for info you can share. Your ministry is right on!

Dan,

Honestly this game is not something that we are to familiar with. Safe eyes will not pick this up because you are not using a Internet browser to operate it. I would do some more research on line and see what you find there. Online rooms and items that allow for chatting are always avenues for possible adult items.Sorry we could not be much more help.

Technology, accountability

Any plans for development of x3 watch for the Nook? Or, have you found any way to permanently disable wireless for Nook (I have first generation, WiFi only version). I've searched online with no luck. thanks.

Right now there have not been any plans for the nook. We would love to have this for all systems but, need to finish the ones we are workin gon and perfect the ones we have right now.

I need to stop watching porn

Hi there, I am in Canada located in Toronto, Ontario. Although, I was browsing through the web finding way to stop watching pornography and masturbation until I saw your video, which I really do appreciate that you are sending a message out, because once your in it is truly an addiction. Since the age of 15 I have been watching porn, thinking at first that it is nothing I will be able to get over it, yet I was completely wrong about and now I am 20 years old. It kills me at times, thinking about how much I have come to sin, and yet I still continue to do so at most 5 to 6 times a day, it has affected my social life. I am not saying I am ugly or unfit, I work out everyday girl say I am cute, but it as become a drug which I honestly am hopeless, where I cannot try to beat. I pray to the lord everyday, I mean everyday trying to seek refugee of the here after and yet it keeps on going. Although, I know I am Muslim and you're Christian, I hope this does not have any barriers on helping my situation out, because I cannot go to a conference meet and disclose this info, I do not have the will power. However, I hope you do take my matter serious and try to help out if you can, because we are all brothers and sister who rooted down from Adam and eve. Thank you and god bless you keep the excellent work guys.... Mr king

you need to talk to someone about this and get accountability with your struggles. Sit down and develop a plan to cut this sin right at the knees. Place accountability software on your computer, mobile phone, and/or your mobile devices. We suggest X3 Watch for accountability software which you can download for free at www.x3watch.com. You should also place a filter on your computer as well. We suggest www.safeeyes.com. This would be like having an alarm on your house and then locking the door with both of these on your computer. When you do get a filter you should have your accountability partner set the password so that you can not just change it when you want to look at porn.

You have to remove this from your life completely. Get rid of any movies, pictures, files, or any item with adult content. Destroy it and be done with it but, when you destroy it do it in a way that will not allow for this to get into someone else’s hands. If the filters and accountability software will not work then you may have to take drastic measures and remove your computer, get an older phone without Internet, or remove the Internet from your computer. It all
comes down to completely removing it and the temptation from your life.

All too often we work on our habits of viewing porn instead of the reasons why we view porn. You need to get down to the root issues of why you go back to it and keep doing so. This may take some time and effort to discover this. But through talking with people about this or your accountability partner you will begin to see areas of your life, your past, and items that trigger your porn use. I strongly recommend counseling for this as they can really get there a lot faster than we can by providing great tools to deal with the items that arise.

Everyone is different but, a few things that I have found that worked in my recovery and from other I want to share with you.

Dive into the word daily. Spend time with God and find out what you have been missing and He will show you things you may not have before.

Track your day and see when you’re most prone to look at porn. From here developed a daily plan to counter attack these temptations based on your observation of your own patterns.

Discover your triggers. When you look back and think of when you were most venerable, what was going on at the time? Were you stressed out, tires, bored, angry, or lonely? These are some of the key triggers for people and you need to locate them and be aware of it. When you notice your trigger topic happening you then need to react and move away from it. It may take sometime to notice and be aware of it but, this is very important.

Share with others: this can also be tough to do but, it will help you grow and heal faster. Also we know how lonely this feels to be trapped like this to porn. We also know that when others see that there is someone else who has been through it or going through it they are more willing to seek help or talk about it. You never know this could be a start to a small group of people who meet and hold each other accountable.

Please know that you are not alone in this and that you can work through this. Yes; it will not be easy but it can be done. We are here for you and praying for you.

I am a accouttabilty person to a friend

can my friend turn off his account without letting anyone knowing? and then turn it back on?

No; the software should kick out a email to you letting you know that it has been turned off.

support group

Over the last year, I've begun experiencing negative impacts in my life from porn use. Some friends have suggested that I get involved in a support group. I looked into Sexaholics Anonymous, but am not sure that's the right group for me, partly because SA is not focused on porn. Are there other groups in the east Ventura County or San Fernando Valley that you can recommend? I live in Simi Valley. I'd be willing to consider groups as far south as LAX. Another thing I guess I should mention is that I'm pretty liberal theologically and in terms of the expectations that should come with Christianity. One thing that struck me about SA was that they had a fairly conservative attitude about sexual expression that is appropriate after deciding to live in what they call "sexual sobriety." I think I could live with their conservative attitude, but it made me realize that I probably don't want to get in a group that is even more conservative. I definitely don't want to be somewhere where I'm going to feel guilty or out of place just because I don't believe everything the leaders believe about sex.

I would look into the X# Recovery Group out in LA. If you would like to get in contact with someone from that group please contact me at info@xxxchurch.com

This is a solid group with great leadership. You will not feel uncomfortable there and you will get the help you need.

gay

can christian be gay

We believe that God loves everyone and that no matter what you do or have done that nothing can take away His love. You can call yourself what you want to but, what really matters is your actions and how you are obeying God and doing what you can to follow in His footsteps.

We do not beleive that same sex relationships are what God intended. We believe that He intended for a man and a women to be in this type of a relationship.

More of a statement of despair

I am going crazy with this issue .Don't know what to do . Help

Erik,

Please email me at info@xxxchurch.com

X3 Watch

Has free X3 changed the frequency of reports to accountability partners? I read a statement on the free X3 site that spoke of monthly emails. I know that reports have been bi-weekly and would like to know if that has changed.

This has not changed for the free version.

download

I triedto downloadthe software on mynext6 Android Android it would mot accept it. What do I need to do because I pur chased it but it did not download.

You can initiate a support request and read through helpful knowledge base articles here: http://x3mobile.zendesk.com/.