Here is Part II, Part I and the Intro in case you missed it.
Another key element to walking through my healing is listening prayer. (This concept has become new to me in the last few years). From the time I was born until I went to college I was required to go to church every Sunday, even if I spent the night at a friend’s house. Out of those many years of church I never learned that I could talk to God and that he would actually talk back!
When Jesus came into this world he gave us the “helper” (John 14:26) which is the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit within us is what we are listening to when connecting with God. Interaction with the Holy Spirit is what brings healing.
It would have been impossible for me to overcome the obstacles I have in my life if I didn’t have a close conversational walk with God, our Father. It is still totally Sci-Fi to me to think that there is a God, the creator of the universe, who actually talks to us. When I look back at my journal where I have typed out the conversations with Him it actually looks like two people Instant Messaging back and forth.
In the beginning it was difficult to figure out which voice in my head was actually the Lord and which was the world, my flesh or the enemy. That is why typing or writing it out helps. When I am writing I may start with asking Him a question or by writing down some praises like “I love you so much father, please draw close to me, thank you for being my protector.” Then I turn my brain off and let my fingers type whatever I feel He is saying. I also ask Him a lot of questions.
Writing works best for me but what mode you decide to use to communicate should be whatever works best for you. Simply quiet yourself, read some scripture, ask the Holy Spirit to speak to you, and sit back and listen. God also speaks to us in images, words, sensings or even a wave of love or peace.
One thing to remember is that when God speaks, He is NEVER condemning and He will never conflict with his written word.
One time I was talking with the Lord and I felt him say “I wanted you.” It seemed so out of place and not something I would have come up with myself. I typed back, “uhh Thank you Lord, of course you wanted me.” When this happened I didn’t fully understand the significance. The next week I found out from my parents that I was not a planned baby and during my pregnancy my parents had gone through a difficult time in their relationship. My dad was a pilot and was gone a lot, they also ran a business out of the house, and my mom already had two other children under the age of 3. She didn’t think she could handle another baby. I was able to receive this information without completely falling apart because of the word the Lord had given me the week before.
Another time I was on vacation in Costa Rica. I was sitting on the front porch of a cabin on the top of a mountain overlooking a beautiful valley filled with vineyards. I was soaking up the beauty and listening to the Lord when he said, “I will always stick up for you.” I broke into sobs. In high school when I was being made fun of my friends would never stick up for me. In those few words, the Lord seemed to hit me deep in one of my wounds and bring healing.
These are just a few of the more impactful interactions I had with the Lord. Now hearing and interacting with the Lord is a continuous process throughout my day. It starts in the morning as soon as I open my eyes. “Father I love you so much. Thank you for this new day. I am so excited about what I am going to learn from you today. I submit myself to your will and please guide me today.” Then I will sit and listen to Him. He usually says reassuring words for my day.
Try it right now, if you are reading this then I am sure you are sitting at your computer. Open a blank document or take out your journal and write this question at the top of the page, “Father, what do you think about me?” Take a minute and quiet your mind. Clear the thoughts in your head and take a few deep breaths. Sometimes it helps to imagine Jesus on the cross. Now, ask Father what he thinks of you and write what He says.....
It is ok if you weren’t able to type anything or if you had too many confusing conflicting thoughts to write anything clear. This is something you have to practice and learn. Ask God to show you how and He will! Just like my last entry on fighting for your healing, continue to push into this. You will get better at it and you will be amazed at the things your Father will tell you.
If you'd like more detailed information on this, I'd recommend the book The Journey to Wholeness in Christ by Signa Bodishbaugh. It is the single most impactful book on teaching me the practice of listening prayer. She does an amazing job of breaking down how listening prayer works and how to integrate it into your life. Another great one is Dallas Willard’s Hearing God.
I am continuing to pray for you. We are in this together and we will make it through. With every healing your life gets more filled with peace and joy. No matter what you are doing during the day take time to listen to what He is saying to you.
