Sex can be such a beautiful thing… in the right context.
Last night on ABC Family’s hit show Pretty Little Liars, one of the show’s main characters, Spencer, went all the way with her long-time boyfriend Toby. They had been waiting, and I had been pretty proud that they were drawing a line. I was (maybe naively?) hoping that they would be the one example of a “hold out” on the show. Previously, the other main characters had all done "it" with their significant others. But last night, in perfect light, with plenty of tender caressing and in the context of love, it happened. And honestly, it looked beautiful. It would only be human for any teen girl (or really any living being, regardless of age or gender) to want to experience what looked like a perfect, beautiful depiction of love, intimacy and sex on the TV screen.
Only, this picture wasn’t perfect. It looked that way (at least at first), but, in reality, viewers were watching two teenagers have movie-star sex. But, if your son or daughter were watching this show alone (or with their friends), they may be deceived by all of the beautiful lighting and tenderness into believing that that’s the epitome of sex and love. They may start daydreaming about having a similar moment with that special someone in their life.
Fortunately for you (the parent), at the very last moment of this episode of the show, the viewers learned that perfect boyfriend Toby is actually a dangerous and deceiving potential murderer. Hopefully that is enough to help the average teenage watcher to think twice before they have sex with that person they currently view as so “special”. They may not be that perfect person they are making them out to be. They could be a deceiving killer, right?
It’s a lot to sort through for the average teen. Unfortunately, a lot of them are doing the sorting out about sex alone, which doesn’t really leave them in good standing. It likely leaves them confused and wanting to have Spencer and Toby like love and sex, sans the potential murderer component.
As parents, it’s important to help your teen look up—to gain some perspective and realize that God’s epitome of love—and sex—is far greater and better than even the romance they see every night on the screen. This is not to say that marriage—husbands and wives—are perfect people… far from it. We live in a world of adultery, abuse and sins deeper and wider than I dare to dive into today, but marriage can also be a beautiful thing. It can be the most beautiful of earthly relationships and the most beautiful experience of sex. Help your kids see and know this. Are you exhibiting a life-giving relationship in your marriage? Are you engaging with your kids and helping them to sort through fact from fiction on sex? If not, then why not start today? We have a number of resources on our site to help. Let's help our kids understand that sex IS a beautiful thing... in the right context... in marriage.