Hi guys...I'm new at this, so bear with me. Basically, I'm a teenage girl. I don't so much struggle with porn as with horrible thoughts, and masturbation. As I write the words, my chest literally aches. All my life, I've been told that girls don't deal with this kind of thing. I was raised in a Christian home with the best parents there are. At a young age, I was accidentally exposed to the definition of sex, and I have struggled with some pretty bizarre sexual desires ever since. I feel like a hypocrite...it's horrible. I wish I could put into words how awful it is. Writing this is humiliating and horrifying...reading my own words makes me feel like a monster. There are good days; there are bad days. I know I am forgiven, but after so long I begin to wonder if I was ever saved to begin with. I remember the time when I was saved, and I know that my deepest desires are to follow God. But after struggling for so many years, I'm beginning to loose hope. I don't want to enter into a dating/marriage relationship with this junk crowding my mind and heart. I hurt when I think of what Christ did for a whore like me. It makes me feel loved and special, and at the same time it makes me feel even worse. Please pray for me...it's really hard to feel so alone about this. That's the biggest issue: feeling alone.