i first started watching porn and masturbating when i was 13. and ever since then i havent been able to stop. there is one exception. when i was a junior and senior in high school i didnt masturbate or look at porn i was actually very close to GOD. but when my father died in december of my senior year i didnt know what to do i didnt know where to go i was lost and thats when i started back again. i miss the closeness i had with GOD and how i talked too him everyday. but now it feels like i dont deserve to be near him because of what i have been doing. i just want too stop. i convince myself all the time when i do do it but when i get finished i feel horrible. please help me stop.