XXXChurch: Womens Blog

PurgingYesterday, I left my 30s.

It’s funny because while a lot of people (and in my experience, especially women) tend to darn near hyperventilate when it comes to entering into their 40s, I am thrilled about it. It has been my belief, for quite some time now, that if you’ve taken each year of your life serious and literally, then when it’s time to get one year older, you should actually be looking forward to it. And boy, did I make my 30s count.

It was in my 30s that both of my books were published.

It was in my 30s that I decided to let having a boyfriend go. (It tends to be more work that it’s worth.)

It was in my 30s that I made real peace with both of my parents.

It was at 32 that I decided to become abstinent.

It was also at 32 that I joined the XXXchurch team.

These are just some of the things that happened to me over the course of the past 10 years. Actually, I’m pretty sure that’s why whenever people ask me, “So, if you had one word to define what your 30s were like what would it be?My answer has been an unwavering and definite “purge”.

I have purged so much sexual toxicity, and fear, and unforgivingness, and low-self esteem, and the confusion between what it means to have a spiritual connection with someone vs. a powerful sexual craving for them.

I have purged chasing what doesn’t want to be caught by me and slowing down so that what is meant for me can truly catch up.

I have also purged envy. So much of my life was once riddled with envy in the sense of not embracing one of my favorite quotes on the word: “Envy is counting someone else’s blessings more than your own.” (Um, that’s basically what it means to covet and coveting is what the 10th Commandment tells us not to do, by the way - Exodus 20:17).

I have also purged masturbation and porn too.

So, what does all of this have to do with you? That’s a good question, actually.

A Scripture that I “came to know” pretty much in my early 30s is I Timothy 4:14-16(AMP): “Do not neglect the gift which is in you, [that special inward endowment] which was directly imparted to you [by the Holy Spirit] by prophetic utterance when the elders laid their hands upon you [at your ordination]. Practice and cultivate and meditate upon these duties; throw yourself wholly into them [as your ministry], so that your progress may be evident to everybody. Look well to yourself [to your own personality] and to [your] teaching; persevere in these things [hold to them], for by so doing you will save both yourself and those who hear you.”

As I have looked back and seen just how much more stable and secure and trusting of God and myself I have become as the direct result (DIRECT RESULT) of leaving sexual compromise behind, I have been honored to see the domino effect it has had on the lives of others---including people who I’ve connected to via this platform.

You know, sometimes we don’t realize that when God calls us to be healthy and whole, it’s not just for our sake.(Tweet This!) It’s also because he knows that there are people who need our testimony so that they can do the same.

I am pretty sure that there is someone reading this right now who is “super struggling” with some kind of sexual sin and trust me, I’ve been there. Abstinence is not easy. Abstinence is not fun. Sometimes, it has me downright in tears. But tears cleanse. Tears purify. Tears help you to see things more clearly. Much more clearly.

I didn’t think I would ever get to a place where I loved myself enough to not take my body and emotions so casually but I’m here now. And trust me, whatever kind of “pleasure” your sexual-drug-of-choice might be, it doesn’t come close to the freedom that comes in knowing that you’re better (so much better) than a one-night stand or a porn flick or having sex by yourself with yourself.

God has so much more for you. And for me.

Whatever is holding you from all of that, please---let it go. Purge it.

And then watch. Just watch what happens…

I am a living testament.

Stay tuned.

 

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Here's How Purging Changed My Life by XXXchurch.com is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License.