All day long I’m around media – computers, television, radio, newspapers, magazines and smart phones. I touch at least 10 major types of media on most days. All of these media outlets have been triggers for me when it comes to sexual temptation. I need to have a well-thought out plan for each category.

Before I give you a survey of my media and my strategy, here are some key recovery principles that need to be worked when it comes to media. These paint the larger picture of recovery. These principles apply to media as well as other areas of temptation.

  • Identify your triggers.

 

  • Set up roadblocks.

 

  • Have a defensive and an offensive purity strategy. Write it down. Share it with a buddy.

 

  • Get protection on your computer and mobile devices.

 

  • Set up good boundaries around your media.

 

  • Eliminate (or severely limit access to) certain types of media.

 

  • Get accountability around your strongest triggers.

Here’s a walk you through my day and all the media outlets I touch.

iPods / iTunes

Triggers – Download inappropriate music, movies, shows, or podcasts.

Strategy – Be careful with searches. Preview music. Only subscribe to safe shows or family oriented shows. Occasionally talk with my wife and accountability partner about it.

Kindle Fire
Triggers – Download or watch sexual videos. Go to unfiltered websites. Search for questionable apps.

Strategy – I have accountability software on my Kindle Fire. It does not report the details of my web searching and app use, just general usage and times. I have configured the device to require a password to get on the web (my wife has this password). Purchases and downloads can also be restricted on the device. I keep in touch with my accountability partner about my Kindle usage.

Work Computer
Triggers – Search for questionable sites or images.

Strategy – I have accountability software on my work computer. It records all of my activity and sends reports to my accountability partners.

Sirus XM Radio

Triggers – Listen to sexual content on radio stations, talk stations and entertainment stations.

Strategy – I downgraded my package from Premium to Family. It takes out stations like Howard Stern, Playboy, and the R-rated music and comedy channels. Some of the comedy or entertainment channels still have programming that’s trigger. I check these in with my accountability partner if I start feeling a “pull”.

Phone

Triggers – Unhealthy texting, web searching or contacts.

Strategy – My internet browser on my phone is completely disabled. No problem. I have texting, but don’t do it often. My list of contacts is mostly men.  The phone has not been a problem for me so far. When I’m on someone else’s smart phone I get on and get off.

Home Computer

Triggers – Search for questionable sites or images.

Strategy – I have Accountability software on my work computer. It records all of my activity and sends reports to my accountability partners.

TV / Cable / Satellite / DVR

Triggers – Watch or DVR questionable shows.

Strategy – Our satellite requires a password for rated-R or MA shows and for shows with sexual content or nudity. My wife has the password. This has taken care of most of the problems. I had an honest talk with my wife about trigger channels. She has blocked those as well. We have a couple of TVs with antennas (no satellite). We have deleted trigger channels. I do not watch TV late at night. If I start surfing out of boredom or feel sexual pulls I turn it off. I think before I DVR a show.

DVD’s / Blue-Rays / Redbox / Blockbuster

Triggers – Renting sexually-charged DVDs. Hiding rentals.

Strategy – I check out www.pluggedin.com  for reviews on DVDs before I rent. I have been replacing my DVD watching with more Netflix binge watching of good shows. I never hide anything that I’m renting.

Going to Movies

Going to Movies

Triggers – Intentionally going to movies with sexual content. Being surprised by sexual content at movies I didn’t research.

Strategy – I look at the movie reviews on www.pluggedin.com. If there is sexual content or nudity I avoid it (with very few exceptions). I’m super cautious when it comes to rated R movies. I go to the movie with my son or with a buddy most of the time. If there is a sexual scene or trailer I turn my head, look at the back of the chair in front or the corner of the screen.

Netflix
Triggers – Watch sexually-charged movies or shows. Surf titles, descriptions and categories that are sexual.

Strategy – My accountability report picks up the content I watch. It does not pick up my surfing. I have to bounce my eyes and limit my searching. Sometimes “get in, get out” works best. Other times I need to research good shows to watch first and go straight to them. On the Netflix site I cannot eliminate categories (Gay/Lesbian, Horror, and Romantic). They do have a general content control. I have R and MA content blocked except by password.

Magazines / Newspaper / Mailers

Triggers – Surf through soft core content and circulars, hiding.

Strategy – Any magazines or mailers go straight to my wife or the trash can. My wife sifts through the newspaper circulars first. I limit myself to certain sections of the paper. I don’t buy magazines without my wife knowing about them.

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The biggest part of my media purity strategy is roadblocks, healthy alternatives and honest conversations with my wife and accountability partners. Every piece of media you touch needs a strategy plan.

I hope this gets you thinking about your own connections with media and where they meet purity. The bigger picture is not about control and legalism. It’s setting appropriate boundaries so we can use the media freely.

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Jeff Fisher blogs regularly at Porn to Purity and podcasts twice a week on his Top Tips For Sexual Purity Podcast.  Email him at [email protected].