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Porn Makes Me See Women as Sex Objects

by Mike Stonehill on December 5th, 2012 in Men

When a person looks at porn, whether man to woman or woman to man what does it in effect do to the object of lust?

I have to think of the intent that God intends for the act of sex to really get a picture of what that really does. God created sex to be the expression of love and healthy relationship between a man and a woman. Ultimately it is as simple as why else did God create it to be so pleasurable. You can take it to the extreme and say that sex is only intended for procreation, furthering the human race and making more people. But if that were the case, why are our bodies created in a way that when man ejaculates the sperm to join with the egg it feels good? Why does the woman’s body respond to arousal with a similar orgasm if she is only the receiver of donated sperm?

Because sex is intended to be an expression of love and the joining of two people in marriage to become one and also further the human race by making more people in the process. This is an oversimplification but my point is it is not just an act of mating. Now when we look at porn and imagine the process of having sex with that person is there any love involved? Not a bit. It is about making our bodies emit those same hormones and chemicals that God created us to have and only to have the resulting self-gratification and momentary feeling of euphoria. So what does that make the object of our lust? Merely a nameless attractive person of the opposite sex that stimulates or chemical process and imagination to feel good.

Then after the fact we experience the negative effects of the guilt, perhaps shame and self-loathing that many times happens. I can’t keep from thinking that the lovely girl I just was imagining having sex with is somebody’s daughter, perhaps some child’s mother, somebody’s sister, somebody that Jesus came to die for that that person would have all in life here and eternally that God intends for her. I just used her for a selfish act. Some of you reading this will say, “Hey, no harm no foul. She posed for the picture, probably made a few bucks doing it and it put food on her table so she isn’t harmed by it so what is the problem?” To which I would say, what does God want us to do? Is that the best we can do for that person? If you are really that concerned about putting food on her table do you give food to the needy? Do you do anything else to help people? This is not about guilting you, but getting us all to realize we need to treat all people with respect and dignity.

Objects of sexual self-gratification are just treated as that, objects. Those of you coming here to get help with sexual addictions are just like all of us that need help in our areas of struggle. Somebody determined that sexual addictions was something that people needed help with and much of the world looks at those people with scorn and pity and ignores trying to help those struggling. We are all “objects” that a real God sent His real Son to die for so that we could live life the way He intends us.

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  • So true. The easy thing about porn is that it doesn’t argue with you, require you to change your plans (i.e. honey, could you get off the computer & help me with the dishes), or ever tell you, “Not tonight honey, I have a headache.” It’s always available, never condescending, or require you understand its emotions. In other words, it’s empty. And that’s what you get after you USE it. Nothing.

    Relationship are hard. They are the tool God uses us to refine our character in his image. And that’s what you get after you LIVE it. Love.

    The enemy would much rather have us be a bunch of empty, selfish nothings (the product of porn) than myriad reflections of God’s character (the product of pursuing right-relationships).

  • InMyOpinyun

    The argument is being made that “imagining have sex” is a horrible sin, and of course, it isn’t. A more accurate assertion would be that imagining an unlawful sexual act is sinful.

    My thots: Perving on people is wrong. Sexual imagination is usually harmless and serves its own purpose. Exhibitionists usually enjoy their work.

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