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Why Do I Look At Porn When Times Get Tough?

by Craig Gross on January 21st, 2019 in Podcast, Men, Women, Students

This month, we’re talking about resentment, and a question we’re frequently asked – “Why do I look at porn when times get tough?” – is directly related to our current, ongoing conversation.

Let’s say something bad happens to you. You get fired. You have a fight with your wife. You… (fill in the blank – the list goes on and on).

For many people, emotional or physical pain is a trigger. It doesn’t cause you to look at porn, but it’s a trigger. It’s like a growling stomach, or heavy eyes… your body wants something and creates a desire for fulfillment. Maybe it wants food. Maybe it wants sleep. Maybe it wants porn.

If you’re ever going to figure out why pain perpetuates the pornography habit you can’t quite break, you’re going to have to find the root cause.

And you’re going to have to dig deep for it.

You need to learn what your triggers are. Hard times fall on us all, and we need to know how to deal with them in a healthy way.

Today, I wanted to introduce you to my friend Brandon. In this video, Brandon shares not only how he has learned to deal with the pain in his life, but how to get to the root of it and help others understand their own pain, too.

MY FAVORITE QUOTES FROM THIS PODCAST EPISODE

  • You have to learn how you’re going to respond in tough times… because tough times are going to hit you.
  • We don’t want to excuse unhealthy or unhelpful behavior. We want to expose the pain beneath, and uproot it.
  • At some point, you either have to face the pain or you’ll be crushed by the weight of it. God’s grace and mercy in my own life has been something I can’t even put to words… we have a Savior who has shown me that I am not alone.
  • I know I can go to Jesus and hear him say, “I know you, I created you. I love you. I’ve shaped you. I’ll hold your hand through this. I’ll walk through it with you.” Rather than use his hands to hurt me, he hung on a cross to save me. And when I think about that – when I meditate on it, when I look at it – I think, there’s nothing that I can’t face (whether it’s been done to me, or whether I’ve done it to someone else).
  • Christian community is so important. But we need to be careful to actually be doers and not just hearers, here. We do a decent job of saying, “I want to be there with you. I want to care for you. I’ll pray for you.” But do we? Oftentimes, we don’t follow through on our intentions: to walk this life out together. What does it actually mean to get into the trenches with someone?
  • I think you have to come to the realization that you are going to solve it or die trying. You’re going to address it or die trying. You’re going to go find help or you’re going to die trying. There’s no way around it.
  • Joseph – after being thrown into Egyptian slavery – tells his brother, “That which you intended for evil, God intended for good.” I think that’s what’s been true in my life.

 

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