Questions


Frequently Asked Questions.

Why am I not strong like others?

Time and time again on this site I’ve seen people who fight with hearts burning with the Holy Spirit, denouncing their passions and desires, and even people who have conquered this addiction for months at a time! I guess I’m just wondering why everybody else around me fights so much harder than I do. I’m not asking to “be stronger”, and I understand the grace that God has given to me but, things like one day actually being free from pornography and having a wife and children seem so far gone for me. I’ve taken practical steps and even if I do conquer pornography one day i’m convinced that without a miracle, i’ll never be rid of my sinful mind, and all the horrible thoughts I think. I’m in deep and I want to get out but I can’t. How do I fight? Please pray for me, my name is Noah.

How do I get off of this?

I didn’t get a reply back, it’s probably why I gave up on this site. I have been addicted to pornography since the age of nine. At first it was curiosity, now it’s obsession. I have these sick fantasies about kids now. I am so scared of what I’ll do one day, I feel as if I can control it, but just thinking about it is bad, right? Two years ago I went to a wilderness camp and it was the accountability thing. My partner was a long way away and I can’t talk to him. I’m too ashamed to talk to anyone in my family. They’ll think I’m a monster. Just give me a instruction plan, and I’ll do it! That’s all I’ve ever wanted! How do I get out of this? I also don’t have 100 bucks to spend on the Recovery thing, either. Otherwise I would be using that…

I’m sorry you did not get a reply back that you were expecting.   We have so many resources available to you for free in the resources sections for men/ women/ students/ couples/ pastors etc.   

If you are starting to go down a road of fantazizing about children then I would highly recommend that you seek out some counseling right away.  Being embarassed is understandable but if you don’t deal with this head on, it could take you where you never thought you would go and I hate the thought of you ruining your life becuase you did not get your thoughts under control.  I don’t believe you are going to be able to do this on your own.  You need help and help is available to you.  You are not alone.  You are so young yourself and you can definitely deal with this and have the life that you were meant to live!

Consider calling a local counselor in your area or contact Pure Life Ministries for a counseling referral. 

Porn addiction

Hi, I have been with my boyfriend for just over 3 years and it is likely that we are going to get engaged soon. We are both Christians. Unfortunately I have an addiction to pornography that I am struggling with quite a lot. It’s very hard to stop even though I want to so much! A lot of the advice I have read on your site and other christian sites is that accountability is very important when trying to recover/deal with addiction. I would actually really like to be accountable with someone but I am so embarrassed. I’m not really close to, or don’t feel there’s anyone I could talk to about this. I would feel comfortable talking about it with my boyfriend, and I do want to, but I’m not sure if this would be inappropriate. As in, it would be better to be accountable to a female. Plus I’m not sure what would happen to our relationship. But then it’s probably something I should talk about with him before we get engaged/married as I expect it will be something that I will need to have a lifelong vigilance against… Also, perhaps unsurprisingly, we do struggle with sexual sin in our relationship so I’m not sure how it will affect that. I should note that I am thinking about joining an x3group but I’m from Australia and so the time difference makes joining difficult! I hope that all makes sense. I would really love some help/advice with this! Thank you so much, Kelly.

I think you are wise to get some face to face accountability with WOMEN.   Joining an X3group would be good if you can make that work— however I think you might it helpful to talk with a leader in your church.  I know you are embarrassed but shame is not of God and truly He will honor your desire to be free and He speaks about confessing our sins to others as well as what happens when we conceal our sin.

You are wise dealing with this before you enter into marriage and I would strongly encourage you to deal with the sexual sin in your relationship.

You might find some articles at Pure Life Ministries helpful.  

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