Questions

Frequently Asked Questions.

Downloading filters

Hi there. I am wanting to download your programme that stops any access to porn sites. I have 4 boys and feel it is a huge necessity. Please could you go through, step by step how I do this. I would like to put it on all our technology ie smartphones, ipads and computers. Is it possible to have everything linked to one account, under one name? What will the cost be and can I pay with my credit card in South Africa? Kind regards

My 8 year old son reacted to seeing breasts on a documentary…has he been inappropriately “awakened?”

We were watching the documentary, “Babies” which is rated PG. There was “cultural and maternal nudity” which means full on breasts and nursing. My 8 year old son told me that seeing their “private areas” made him feel bad/uncomfortable and that he felt his penis getting bigger. He’s never seen any images of a mature woman’s breast before as far as I know. I explained to him that in certain cultures, women’s breasts aren’t considered private but they are in ours and that the way his penis felt is perfectly natural but just not appropriate at his age. He responded, “When I’m married like Daddy that’s when it is appropriate.” I told him that until then, he’ll know that if he sees something that makes his penis feel like that, he’ll know that it might not be appropriate for him at that time and to remove himself from that situation. I feel awful that I have mistakenly allowed him to be “awakened” him sexually and that this has caused irreparable damage. What should I do/have I done?? Thanks in advance.

Hi Cindy,

I think you’re OK and I don’t think you allowed anything to awaken.  This IS normal and how awesome that you were around when it took place so you could have the conversation!!    I would like you to consider getting the latest book written by Craig Gross and David Dean called Touchy Subjects.   It will help you have ongoing conversations with your son (which need to happen).   Also be careful to not shame your son (and I know you are not doing this and I believe you are an awesome mom!)  for this happening— it is normal and calling it inappropriate makes it sound like he did something wrong.

 

God bless you

My 7 year old lite girl is obsessed with videos of all things (human, cartoon, and animal) giving birth.

About 6 months ago I checked the history in my daughter’s IPad. It was pages and pages of searches for pregnancy, birthing videos. Not one search contained anything sexual in nature, not even a kiss. It was strictly birth and pregnancy. She even went so far as to looking up her favorite cartoon characters pregnant and/or giving birth (yes people actually make drawing and cartoons of My Little Ponies in this was fashion). I decided to tell her about birth and told her she could ask me anything. She refused to ask me anything. I let it go thinking she was just going through a phase. I just checked her iPad this morning and she’s back at.it. there is so much in the history that it took me three to five minutes to scroll through it all. There was not one other search..not one.that didn’t have to do with her interest. I’m going to put a filter on her iPad before I give it back to her. I’m more concerned.with the obsession. Some of her.searches this time.we’re about bats giving birth, pinkie pie is pregnant, goat giving.birth to twins, my.water.broke, among others. I need to mention my daughter goes to an awesome Christian School, we do a mother daughter bible study everynight (she recently asked Jesus to live in her heart) she is smart, truly beautiful, and extremely well behaved. I am an extremely open, layed back, non judgmental, and a good listener. I thought we had a close relationship ,but she.won’t.talk to me.about this. HELP!

Hi Tiffany,

I think that if you feel strongly that this is obsessive then seeking out a counselor whose profession is child-development would be most insightful.

Personally I think if you have put a filter on the computers and iPad (which we would highly recommend regardless) than you can control the content she can access.  

I agree with you though that her shutting down to not even discuss this with you when she discusses everything else with you may also warrant a trip to that counselor. 

God bless you and give you guidance, discernment and direction in this.

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