Frequently Asked Questions.
Hey.. Im Nasser, I’m currently 16. This is my first time on this site, I received this green pamphlet (at a small event at the University of Miami; Called Jesus loves pornstars) — listing site that could help, and give advice for addiction, lust or what not .. Okay, so the thing is , I don’t know when this got started :/ , one day I just kind of realized I’ve been doing this to myself. And I started looking back on it.. I remembered when I was about 6 or 7 I was at my house just browsing the t.v. until I got to morning cartoons , but I ended up on channel, where this lady was on top of this man.. I had no idea what this was. And one day, was I was about 10 years old, I was up in the morning as well, and I searched up porn on the internet, and I think I quickly realized what I saw wasn’t good .. But it wasn’t until I started middle school, that I learned all that I saw, and started to get the bad habit to continue to watch.. I was also a loner, I had one acquaintance, that i only realized a couple years back, that he was a bad influence on me, because from what I remember, He showed and talked a lot about porn with me, by just a while later, I was already, masturbating. I had liked this girl, but back then, after introduced to porn officially, I know now, I was lustful, I still remember scenario’s I had. So currently, I learned a lot of stuff, but at the same time, I feel like I haven’t learned at all. And for a long time now, I’ve been depressed, undetermined, and feeling like every time after I masturbate, I am automatically punished, in one form or another, and it will be a surprise to me that day or days. I had a really bad stomach virus, I had thrown up violently, that midnight, in total i believe i threw up almost 13 times 🙁 .. and sometimes when im afraid im going to be punished, I sometimes feel that i might throw up again, or have lack of sleep, or continuous sexual thoughts that i do not put in my head, etc. I’m christian… well in fact, i wouldn’t want to call myself that, I would call myself a traitor, to the very merciful and holy being that made me, and a traitor to myself. I want to learn, to stand strong inside my mind, I don’t my mind, to control me, spiritually, I want to control my mind. Because I choose, and I know better. But it is so difficult.. and with other girls, im so afraid of being intimate, because, when I look at her hopeful face, looking at my with innocent eyes.. I feel my heart drop, my digestion system, stutter, and utter feelings of guilt, and evil. and i am in panic, and disgust; which also relates to the my stomach virus, which i had of January of 2011. But it situations like these, I feel as if it never left :c I need help, I need constant guidance.. because my personal house hold situation, we are not exactly equip, to deal with one situation for long, we have a lot on our mind, it’s one mother, and 3 children. I’m the middle .. so imagine. my mother is loving and caring, but how can she deal with so much all at once, only God knows. But I need someone, to hold me up.. besides her. or occasionally myself. And I apologize, I have taken so much space. I know who ever is answering this, is not my therapist, but I’m currently seeking advice. there is so much more i would get into, but i see that i must stop. in basics, i need help getting near God. I need help not being afraid of God, or myself, or the Girl. I need help being determined.. because I’ve been so tired.. and i rarely have peace of mind..
Confess this to God and tell Him that you want to change and that you want for Him to send people in your life who will help you win this fight. He will hear your pray and He is a powerful God but, He will not just come down here and stop it for you. He will provide you the tools and the resources but, He wants you to step and do this thing.
After you have talked to God about this find someone right away that you know who can be your accountability partner. Someone who you see often and will have the ability to hold you accountable at all costs. Being your age I would suggest it be someone who is your elder and will be able to provide good mature counsel on this issue. This can be someone from your church, family member, and maybe even your parents. I know this step is tough but, you have to do this if you want to get free from this. You will not be able to do this on your own.
After you have an accountability partner you need to sit down with them and build a plan figure out what your triggers are and how they affect you. Get accountability software. If the internet or mobile devices are you hang up and this is where you turn to get your porn, get accountability and filter software right away and get this covered. We have a great program called X3 Watch that you could use for this. Set up a meeting schedule to meet with your accountability partner to discuss how things are going and if you are following your sobriety plan that you have developed with them.
Do not think this will go away over night; you have trained your brain to need this crap and you will need to train your brain that it is not needed and that it will hurt you. Celebrate small victories and do not give up if there are stumbles, keep going and dig in for the fight. Please know that you are not alone in this and that God loves you so much. He will never remove His love for you because of what you did, are doing, or might do during your recovery. We are here praying for you and know that you can do this.
I’ve never looked at porn, masturbated, or had sex. I’m very glad that God brought me through and that I’m still pure but I still have a heart for those going through these kinds of things and in the industry. The problem is that I don’t think people will listen to me because I don’t understand. Any ideas of what I can do to contribute?
Do not allow for thoes lies to fill your head. There are so many ways that you can help and never been inslaved to the sin.
Check out https://www.fireproofministries.com you can find many ways to help out and serve those in need.
My loving boyfriend is struggling with a porn addiction. I know it sounds crazy to say he is still loving; but he is. With all that is within him, he wants to beat the addiction. He bought himself a block but there are still a few things that slip through. Its not as hardcore of porn, but it still isn’t God honoring obviously. The thing is, we’d love to get married soon but I cannot even think about having sex on our honeymoon with this demon still apart of his life. Other than prayer, how can I help him? What resources are most helpful?
He needs to find someone who will be willing to walk through this with him. I would suggest that he tries to find someone at his church and tell them what is going on and that he needs help with this. This person has to be someone who will be willing to hold him accountable and be honest with him.
I would also suggest he gets the book Pure Eyes and goes through that to get a better understanding of what he is going through and what he needs to do to start the healing.
Know that you guys are not alone in this and that God is right there with the both of you. We are praying for you.