Questions

Frequently Asked Questions.

Porn

I have been dating my boyfriend for about 4 months now, but we have known each other for almost two years. Recently we had a confession time of our past and things we were struggling with. I confessed to masturbation as well as porn (however, porn has not been a recent issue). Anyways, he confessed to the same things, but had told me a while back that porn was in his past, and I found out recently that it’s still something he struggles with. He lied to me because he didn’t want me to leave him based on a weakness, which I can understand. However, I am so troubled on how to handle the situation now. I need help! I am not about to leave him, but I don’t want this lifestyle to continue. Any suggestions?

Hi Jessica,

I would spend some time in the spouses section reading through the blogs and the resources.  I realize you’re not married but you can get a good idea of what healthy partnership looks like as well as if you really want to take this on.

You may also want to check out www.partnersforpurity.com

 

Blessings

Addiction to porn

Im a 23 yo famale and I got adicted to porn wheni was 12 years old. I have tried to quit so many times i have lost track of it. I grew up in a strict christian home where things like sex and pornography were never discussed but were always said to be terrible sins that God frowned at. With this in mind i could never tell anyone and i carried around the shame for 10 years before i was able to tell someone last year. I have told four people since then and it doesnt make it any easier to overcome. I long for intimacy that isnt related to sex. i have never had intimacy like that with God or man and i found it in pornography even if its just for a few moments. I have tried to find support groups or anything at all that can help a woman struggling with this addiction but its still such a tabboo that im too scared to ask. Please help me i feel like im drowning…

Hi Dolly,

X3groups is now running groups for women.  Perhaps that would be a group option for you.

 

Rape pornography

I don’t understand the draw of rape pornography. All three of my sons have been found watching it. It is out there in so many forms: live-action video, anime, walk-throughs, etc. I need to know how to help address this. I worry that I messed up with my other son in addressing this and heaped shame on him. I don’t want to do that to my youngest and I have to talk to him about watching anime rape cartoons. It turns my stomach and is so painful to even think about! How can my precious son find anything even remotely interesting in this!?! It is horrific! We have talked with them quite plainly about sex, abuse, God’s design, and I thought rape. I don’t know how to help him, please help me.

While we are not counselors here,  we can point you to resources.  Have you visited our Parent’s section?  There are so many blogs, articles and helpful  information.

It may also help you to call a counselor that deals with sexual development so that they can help you walk through this and help you to address it and perhaps even a meeting with your son.

I agree it is disturbing and you should not ignore that warning sign.  I’m not saying your son(s) will end up doing harm but clearly violence against women should be discussed.   I commend you for seeing the need to do this without shame and I commend you for not just pushing it under the rug.

God bless you.

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