Q: My husband has been addicted to porn for years and is trying to walk with the Lord, but refuses to get help. I have prayed and fasted, is our next step confrontation from our pastors?

A. I suspect that your husband is still addicted to pornography partly because he refuses to get help. If he is just starting to work at overcoming he must realize that it is a battle and one he shouldn’t fight on his own. He must learn to humble himself. The Lord often uses other people to help us. No man is an island.

Sometimes it is hard for men to admit to other people that they are struggling. If he is serious about getting help he will find someone that would be willing to help. Perhaps he would consider the Overcomers At Home Program. Also, I would recommend that you give him a copy of At the Altar of Sexual Idolatry. These are both excellent resources for your husband.

If however, your husband has been spending years “walking with the Lord” and “walking in sin,” he has been attempting the impossible: living in two worlds. In any event, I believe you should get your Pastor involved. I know it is probably scary to take that step, but sometimes the wife has to do the hard thing for her husband.

God bless you for your courage to fast and pray. The prayers of the righteous avail much. There are a lot of opinions out there and some would tell you to move on, that you don’t have to put up with this kind of thing, you need to take care of yourself, etc. But the fact that you are willing to fast and pray for your husband tells me that not only are you willing to sacrifice but you are also willing to go to the next level of love which many are unwilling to do. It is so easy to give over to the idea of “looking out for number one,” but I respect you for fighting for him and your marriage. Love always costs something! True love gives and does not seek to receive. True Love died for us. He is our example.

Originally posted by Kathy Gallagher of Pure Life Ministries

Originally posted on X3 Church July 2009