This has been on my heart for a few weeks:
Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. ~ 1 Corinthians 13:12,13
Recently a friend came to the end of her struggle with cancer. Despite a two year battle, it was time for her to go home. As I processed all that she, her husband, and her three young daughters went through it got me thinking about these verses and what it would feel like to be in my last days, face to face with the reality and presence of God.
I have had so many ups and downs in this life. And we have certainly had them in our marriage. We’ve experienced countless victories and nearly as many defeats. Sometimes I have felt as if I was in a house of mirrors where my reflection (or my view) is completely distorted by my circumstances. The circumstances of our choices, our marriage, his addiction. These are the times when fear, uncertainty, and despair most cloud my view. But I imagine that when I’m at the end, when I approach that point of nearly total completeness, I will look at my life and know. Fully know.
I will know why (or at least realize what mattered).
I will see all of His plan.
I will be assured of what was important in this life.
All of the hurts in our marriage, all of the silly fights with my kids, all of the times I took offense, and every second that I was focused on myself will no longer matter. I’ll see clearly and I’ll know (I mean really know), just as I am fully known.
As I studied this passage I decided to turn to The Message where verse 13 is translated like this:
But for right now, until that completeness, we have three things to do to lead us toward that consummation: Trust steadily in God, hope unswervingly, love extravagantly. And the best of the three is love.
Even in the pain. Even in the hurt. That is my prayer today.