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Sex + Love = Losing the Romance

by Katie S on February 14th, 2013 in Spouses

            “Can you feel the love tonight?”  NO Elton, I can’t!  I have done 12 loads of laundry, 1st grade spelling homework, hours of fourth grade homework, I’ve cleaned pee off the bathroom celling (I have boys).  I now have play dough under my nails and baby puke in my hair.  My panties say “fruit of the loom” and there is not a stitch of silk or lace on them.   I don’t think I even know what romance means.  Kids, work, and life just seemed to choke out the romance we had at the start of our relationship. 

Hey Webster….what do you have?

ROMANCE: Verb:

1: to try to influence or curry favor with especially by lavishing personal attention, gifts, or flattery

2: to carry on a love affair with

I’ll take #1 thank you.  Did you hear that Husband?  LAVISH ME!!!

So how do we get the romance back?  What is our role as wives? I have written posts on how to tempt him sexually and get him going………this is a little different.  I think as wives, we really need to get a hold of the schedule and CARVE out the time!  That may mean a weekend or night away, getting a baby sitter, or having the kids go to bed early.  We have to MAKE that time happen.  I have found great deals on hotels right down the street for super cheap.  One quick night away from your familiar may do you and your relationship a world of good!

The bottom line is this: It is NOT easy.  Many of us WISH our husbands would just make the romance happen, but I am a firm believer that if we lead our husbands will copy and follow…..(translation: model it for him and he will get it and start to do it on his own!). Be creative!  This does not have to be a long exotic vacation…but if you can do that, go for it!  It has to be quick breaks here and there and worked into the everyday.  Like I said I have written posts on how to get him going….reread those….but here are 5 quick ideas.

1.      A Hotel for the night (give him clues and have him meet you there)

2.      A private dinner in your home picnic style( blanket on the floor) NAKED.

3.      Notes left for him telling him how much you love him, what you love about him, and/or what you want to do to him.

4.      Mix CD or play list.  Cheesy? Maybe…but music is powerful and may spark some Gooood memoires from the past….

5.      Lights off, movie, one blanket and the heat turned WAY down.

Your relationship is worth it.  Don’t sit on your butt hoping he will make the first move and bring the romance back.  SHOW HIM!  YEAH BABY.

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