Everyone loves inviting their friends over and hanging out. Getting some popcorn on the go and drinks and sticking on a DVD of the latest blockbuster Porn movie while everyone spanks their monkey, right?…Right?

Of course not.

You just don’t do this. In fact you may be reading this completely disgusted at the idea. But for some of you this is exactly what you do, just without the other people part…and hopefully the popcorn.

Sure, maybe when you first discovered porn it was through a friend who showed you some images or some sites in his bedroom but now it’s something you do in the privacy of your own room with your door firmly shut.

That’s because porn is isolating.

Porn is not your friend. It takes you away from your friends, your family, the places and projects you were made to live for, the connections that were meant to change the world.

To understand how porn disrupts the flow of our lives it helps to go back to the Garden of Eden and see how we are wired to live in community. God had created a world which he declared good then goes as far to say that it is not good for the man to be alone. Everything that He made was the way it was meant to be except this one thing.

Adam and Eve is more than just about marriage. It’s not even just about being in a romantic relationship. It is about humankind not being right unless we go on the journey together. About the flow of our very existence becoming clogged unless we have company. Simply put we need other people.

God had created Adam and Eve to enjoy each other and to live in complete intimacy with Himself. By taking the fruit they destroyed that intimacy.

This is what porn does to us. It takes what is beautiful and right, sex and distorts it so we hide from God and others. Just like Adam and Eve a shame that didn’t exist before comes between God and us.

The only way to reconnect is to come back round to the way it was supposed to be. To put our trust back in God and receive our worth, our confidence, our identity in the one that allows us to live in community with Him and others.

This is why it is so important to tell someone if you struggle with porn. That’s why it won’t just go away. It will destroy your relationships if you let it. Alternatively, you can destroy its hold over you by living in relationships with others.

Then you can wake up to the joy that is ours if we live with other people. The deep connections that result from living openly and honestly with others. The freedom to not hide in shame or guilt but with confidence and hope.

Sex was not meant to be viewed online with your pants around your ankles.

And you were not meant to live your life alone. We need to invite others into our lives in open and healthy relationships.

Now someone put the popcorn on.