Can I trust you with a secret? This topic makes me uncomfortable. Masturbation. It just seems like a nasty disgusting word and action. I’m not saying that it is or isn’t, though. Truth of the matter is that every guy I know (and that you probably know) has done it at least once–most guys I know still do it. When the big M word comes up, every guy kind of squirms. But it’s the elephant in the room. It gets dirty looks when the topic is brought up, which is probably why it is never mentioned in church.
I remember the first time I viewed pornography. I was four years old. I had found a Playboy Magazine under by older brother’s cabinet in his room. I’m not sure what made me look for it–I had not known it was there–but it knew my name and it called me daily. I returned, and I was hooked. Fast forward quite a few years, I’m in the sixth grade. I had not looked at porn since that time when I first stumbled upon it. However, I recall the guys in my class speaking of these “hot, naked girls.” As a young male individual, attractive women always catch, and keep, your attention. Since all the guys were talking about it, I decided I’d join this elite group of men and check it out for myself. Sure enough, just as before, I was hooked–again.
I’m not sure how it started, masturbation that is. I’ve spoke with many guys, and we all seem to agree: Porn and masturbation go hand in hand (no pun intended). My assumption has been that porn (obviously) produces a sexual stimulus. When guys get stimulated sexually, well, we like to act out. Underlying, however, it’s a thought issue. Quick Question: When you watch porn, do you not think of the individuals, and maybe throw yourself into the mix? Fantasize? You do? Interesting. The purpose of porn is to create a fantasy that you wouldn’t otherwise have. For example, I had a particular company that I favored. They actually had great looking models that were on all accounts beautiful women. If it weren’t for porn, I’d never see them naked. And if it weren’t for the fantasies that porn produces, I (nor any of the other men) would have never “been” with them. Porn produces a sexual desire: the fantasy. Men, naturally, can handle the rest.
I might add, certain things still trigger me to look at porn. It’s an ongoing struggle. I’ll forever have this baggage, as will most men. One key thing I’d like to say is: Thoughtlessness is your enemy. For example, I enjoy the “adult” cartoons. I think they’re funny. As long as I thoughtlessly watch the cartoons, however, I am able to easily get triggered to view pornography. Why? They make sexual jokes. The joke produces thoughts, the thoughts produce sexual thoughts, sexual thoughts produce watching porn, and watching porn produces masturbation. That’s if I thoughtlessly watch television or listen to music. For other guys, this can be a different trigger. How do I know that thoughtlessness is the enemy? Not only am I a living daily example, but Scripture also mentions it multiple times. I’ll address a commonly known verse:
2 Corinthians 10:5 (The Message)
We use our powerful God-tools for smashing warped philosophies, tearing down barriers erected against the truth of God, fitting every loose thought and emotion and impulse into the structure of life shaped by Christ.
Other translations say that we have to “make every thought captive.” You have the right to choose what you think. Thoughtlessly going through life will rob you of this right and enslave you.
Masturbation. It’s the word that makes most men squirm, women scoff, and pastors unemployed. I’ve been there, you’re probably there, and most every person that you know has been affected some way, somehow by it. It’s not a dirty word; it’s an enslaving action. Thoughtlessness is the enemy. Don’t be suckered in.