Most everyone (at least with guys) has had some sort of an awkward moment when a friend or someone you know wants to show you porn or watch porn with you. Then there’s those other steamy moments of the date. Here’s examples from my personal life that you can learn from, just as I have.
1. How to escape when a friend wants to watch porn-This example for comes from my 9th grade high school winter. I was given the honor to travel with about 50 other students to Louisville, Kentucky with Louisiana State University. It was a great opportunity to meet new people from all over the state of Louisiana. We were split into rooms by gender then into groups of four. I roomed with three other guys that I had never met before. It was late one night and our room had Cinemax. The guy who held the remote turned it to that channel, which shows softcore porn for those who do not know, and we watched it. I of course didn’t want to look uncool since they were older than I, so I sat and watched too. I compromised my faith and beliefs so that I would (to some extent) be presented to the guys as cool.
What I should’ve done: I recently just got back from my final senior trip. It was sad to finally have my high school career come to its end. Again, I stayed with three guys I’ve never met before. The first night, I noticed on the TVGuide pamphlet that the hotel provides that we had Cinemax yet again. Regardless of the fact that I was the oldest, as soon as we got settled, I promptly told the guys, “Look, we’re not watching Cinemax or any porn for that matter. I don’t care what you do on your own time, but tonight we’re not watching that mess.” Instantly, the holiness of the guys steps in saying, “Oh, we would never.” The point from these two stories is in the second one I laid out the boundaries and was up front with how I believed and ultimately, my struggle. If put in this position, be up front and honest with the person and then set up the appropriate boundaries.
2. When a date gets steamy-The reason most dating relationships result in premarital sex is the lack of boundaries. Like earlier, if you don’t set boundaries, things can get out of control but in a very different way. For some guys, as soon as the hand holding takes off, so does our thoughts and we stop thinking with our brains. Set boundaries. Think ahead. Personally, this is my boundaries: hands and hugs. That’s it. Only hold hands and hug. I refrain from kissing for several reasons: I don’t want to get carried away, I don’t trust myself, and I want to save my kisses for my future wife. To each, his own; just make sure that you put some sort of boundaries in place when dating.
In dating and in friendships, set boundaries. Never compromise your faith and beliefs like I did.
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